Eight Years After I Thought the World Would End

Back in ancient times, say the seventies when life was all about high school and making it to the right classes in a row before the buzzer sounded, I never thought the world would last this long. I wondered whether I should marry, have children, and ever live in my own home.

Now I sit cozily in a parsonage--not my home, but good enough for one so temporarily visiting earth and better than I deserve. I've been married over thirty years, raised three children, held two grandchildren, and washed a lot of dishes.

I've watched the escalator of time under my feet as it carried me reluctantly into the future; sometimes it made me dizzy.

One thing I've learned is not to think, "Well, when this is over, I'll.....", or "I just wish I could finish this and get it out of the way," as if life will really start when the current problem is over. Living that way creates bubbles of unhappiness that have to be rushed to reach the "real life", but the escalator never stops, and every little bubble we detest takes up time, just like the bubbles we enjoy. So I'm trying to look for bliss during the most difficult of times. When I can't take any more of a stressful situation, I call my mother or my mother-in-law. I visit my sisters' facebook accounts and look at old pictures. I play a computer game or take a walk, creating a lovely moment to plunk down amidst the raging realities. And I open my eyes. What I mean by that is, I come out of my sightless world of worry, and notice the sun on little green shoots of wheat, the squirrels stealing pecans from the buckets on my back lawn, the shy smiles of friendly souls I encounter.

There is enough beauty in this world to heal a thousand uglies. And when we truly admire the beauty around us, it opens a door to God. We want to say thank you, and so we do, and in His greatness, our little bubbles of trouble fizzle back down to a reasonable size.

Ah well. It is a new year. I know it will be a great one. At least the escalator is going up.